Finding a therapist
Or rather, the right therapist for you….
Taking the first step towards therapy can feel daunting. Often, people spend weeks or even months just thinking about whether to reach out for help. By the time you’re looking for a therapist, you’ve already taken a big and important step – recognising that you don’t have to manage everything alone. But then comes the next challenge: how do you find the right therapist for you?
The truth is, therapy is not a one-size-fits-all process. Just as we naturally feel more comfortable around certain people in everyday life, the same applies when choosing a therapist. The relationship between you and your therapist is at the heart of the work, so finding someone you feel safe with is essential.
Notice how you feel
When you meet a therapist, whether that’s online or in person, take a moment to notice how you feel. Do you feel listened to? Do you sense warmth and understanding? Do you feel able to speak openly, or do you find yourself holding back? It’s normal to feel nervous in the beginning, but you should have a sense that the therapist is genuinely present with you.
Practical considerations
It can also help to think about practicalities. Would you prefer to see someone face-to-face or online? Do you want a therapist nearby so you can attend sessions easily? Fees, availability, and session times are all worth considering too, as these can make the difference between therapy feeling sustainable or stressful.
Approach and training
Therapists are trained in different approaches – such as person-centred, psychodynamic, CBT, or integrative therapy. Some focus on helping you explore your past, while others may work more on practical tools for the present. You don’t need to be an expert in therapy models to choose – many people go by how they feel in the sessions rather than the theory. Still, if you have a particular preference, it can help to ask a therapist about how they work.
Trust your instincts
Sometimes people worry that they have to stay with the first therapist they meet, but that’s not the case. Therapy is your space, and you are allowed to try a few sessions before deciding whether it feels right. Most therapists understand this and will support you in making the best choice for yourself, even if that means referring you on.
Give it time
It’s also worth remembering that the therapeutic relationship develops over time. Trust builds gradually, and it can take a few sessions before you feel fully comfortable. If something doesn’t feel quite right, it can often be helpful to bring this into the session – many therapists welcome openness and will want to explore what might be getting in the way.
A personal fit
Ultimately, finding the right therapist is about connection. You don’t need to have everything figured out before starting; you just need to find someone you feel you can begin the journey with. When you feel supported, heard, and safe, therapy has the potential to be a place of real growth and healing.
