The B word
Boundaries and why they’re important.
When we think about physical boundaries we think of fences; walls; lines on a touch-sport game; your front door. They are there to protect us or communicate a ‘rule’ of some kind. I talk a lot about boundaries because in relationships it’s also important you communicate them to protect yourself:
They protect your wellbeing
Without boundaries, it’s easy to become drained, stressed, or resentful. Boundaries act as a safeguard, helping you prioritise self-care and prevent burnout.They strengthen relationships
Clear boundaries actually make relationships healthier. When you express your needs openly and respectfully, it reduces misunderstandings and creates trust. Others know where they stand with you, and you feel safer being yourself.They build self-respect
Each time you set and maintain a boundary, you reinforce the message to yourself: my needs matter. This builds confidence and self-worth.They encourage mutual respect
Boundaries aren’t about controlling others – they’re about creating fair, balanced connections. They remind us that every person’s time, feelings, and energy deserve value.
Common Myths About Boundaries
“If I set boundaries, people will think I’m selfish.”
In reality, boundaries help you show up in relationships more fully and honestly.“If I say no, people won’t like me.”
Healthy relationships can handle ‘no’. Saying yes to everything often leads to resentment, which damages relationships more in the long run.“Boundaries push people away.”
In fact, they bring people closer. When you set boundaries, you create clearer, more respectful connections.
How to Start Setting Boundaries
Notice where you feel drained, resentful, or uncomfortable – these are signs a boundary may be needed.
Communicate your needs clearly and calmly.
Start small – even saying no once when you usually say yes is progress.
Be consistent – maintaining boundaries takes practice.
Final Thoughts
Boundaries aren’t walls to shut people out – they’re healthy guidelines that help you care for yourself and connect more authentically with others. By setting and honouring your limits, you protect your wellbeing, strengthen your relationships, and create space for the life you truly want
